rain and last visits
by hellodenihere
Summary: Just one more visit, he tells himself. One more visit before everything goes to hell. Post-Rakuyou Arc. Pre-final arc.


Whoever said third time's the charm was a liar. That, or an incredibly lucky bastard. The third time he's been here for the week and nothing has changed since then.

He sighs and stays by a nearby roof under some shop, eyes trailing on the pavement. The gloomy weather turns worse as rain starts to set and it's getting so heavy that that damned pitter patter sound against the pavement is so loud it muffles out the talks all around.

Okay, so maybe things _have_ changed. A hell lot. And the fact that Yoshiwara has stayed the same after all that has happened so far puts an ease to his mind, albeit only a little. Besides, even he didn't know what he was expecting from coming over again and again. What the fuck was he looking for, anyway? Or maybe he's just looking for something to pretend that something might ease his mind.

To put it frankly, he's at a loss. Some sort of a miracle like that is too much to hope for, though a little bit of luck and laughs would be nice. Hell, he's not even in the mood to play pachinko, but everything is a little too quiet back in Kabuki district. Too quiet.

There's a puff of smoke with that damn strawberry scent that distracts him enough to look up to see the kiseru he is all too familiar with. Along with the woman who just loves smoking right on his face. Her expression is a blank as she greets.

"Here again?" Her back is against the wall as she narrows her eyes back at him.

Gintoki puts up a teasing smile while he rolls his eyes. "Whaat? It's not like you didn't expect me, _honey."_ The tension on his shoulders drops, if only a little. His smile stays, as if proud to still call her that nickname as a joke.

Well, jokes were always half-meant.

"It looks like ya chose the wrong time to visit," she draws out a long sigh before dropping her kiseru to the side to look up at the skies, paying no mind to the joke, "this one might take a while to go out."

The scent of the rain grows stronger. He walks over to stand by her side as if by instinct. Without looking at one another they start to talk. Talk about the day, the week, things he can trust himself enough to tell to another person, but never everything. Not really. He's been doing a lot of that lately to people, which is annoying. He's starting to sound a hell lot like Zura.

And she never pries. Never pushes further even when he says the most outrageous things. Things like coming back from the dead over and over again just to scold and taunt a brat stupid enough to leave his family, from deciding to shield a former comrade just seconds after he was trying to take him out himself. It's hilarious. He knows how stupid he sounds from the way he says it all just like how he would complain about the damn weather. With every complaint she just nods and waits for him to go on until he decides that it's enough to change the topic.

This time he chooses to stay quiet. To close his eyes and take a deep breath because he's already said enough. The silence between them is comfortable and he doesn't mind staying like this for a while longer.

"It's starting to let up." She says suddenly as she stands up straight from the wall to continue the patrol he's been interrupting this whole time, lighting up her kiseru once more as she does. Gintoki knows he should probably feel guilty, but that doesn't bother him long enough, so he just blames the rain for taking her time. Yeah, sure. That's definitely the reason why. Brushing this thought to the side, he matches her pace to accompany her.

As much as a hassle the rain was, he couldn't exactly hate its aftermath. Their surrounding feels peaceful enough to take a nap right then and there. All around the residents and visitors are starting to get loud. He sighs.

"These people are carefree as ever." He says in his usual lazy tone, with a hint of annoyance as he goes to scratch the back of his head. Then he feels someone bump his shoulder with theirs. His eyes catches hers and then suddenly he's caught.

No woman who discarded their womanhood should ever have pretty twinkling eyes like that, dammit.

"Thanks to you." There's that tone in her voice, the way she says it so happily and proudly makes him want to vomit. He doesn't mind getting used to hear that delighted voice more often. So what does he do? He shrugs it off of course.

"Yeah, sure, whatever."

Somehow, in an instant he feels her getting distant from him, a few more inches between them now as they walk. He sneaks a peek to look by her.

She's frowning. Tsukuyo's frowning and looking irritated and disappointed and Gintoki doesn't know what he did wrong.

She stops in her tracks and he immediately follows. Huh. There's that thing again. That thing where he finds himself reacting to every little thing she does unconsciously.

"What?"

For some reason, that peaceful air between them is gone. Literally. She blows out a puff of smoke on his face so now he's coughing and coughing and okay so maybe it doesn't feel too good on his eyes either. When he opens his eyes she's looking straight at him. He's still confused but he braces himself for the worst.

"Oi. Give yourself a little more credit, _darling._ "

And just like that, the moment is gone. She leaves him there, stunned as she walks ahead.

It takes a few seconds to snap out of it and catch up to her. And when he does, he yanks her hand back and that makes _her_ confused. He takes her hands in his as he looks back at her.

"O-Oi. Gintoki?"

Ah, whatever. He interwines their fingers together.

"All this isn't over yet." He takes a deep breath. "This carefree shit might not last. " There's this flash in her eyes and her mouth sets on a firm line. She understands.

He lets the words hang in the air. Unspoken words he's not sure he would ever say outloud.

She squeezes his hand before letting go.

"We'll live."

"Heh. How can you be sure of that?"

At that she smiles softly.

"Because it's you, dumbass."

No one knows who started it. A moment ago there's another puff of smoke then the next he can feel her hot breath against him until he closes the distance in between. She was as sweet as he thought she'd be and that makes him smile against her.

In an instant they are apart and maybe a little red in the face. His face is still close to hers and he absolutely refuses to look at her in the eye. All of a sudden reality pulls him right back.

"I don't know about that. I'm sorry."

It takes everything in him to pull away and leave. But before he does, Tsukuyo catches his hand this time. She gives it a squeeze.

"I'll be there with you."

He squeezes back.

And just like that, he finally leaves.

That should be enough of a goodbye for now, right?

« x »

 _a/n:_ so i was looking back at my drafts (most were written 3 or 4 years ago) and i decided to continue this one for the hell of it. don't remember exactly which direction i wanted this to go before but oh well. (honestly looking back now i'm shocked i wrote so much fics but never finished 'em?)

can i just say that i literally learned how to write different types of scripts in college but for some reason i've never really wrote for fun since gintama? i'm trying to enjoy writing again okay. what better way than fics right? right?

anyway yeah, i'm trying to write for fun again. feel free to give me prompts on tumblr or just talk, really. hope you enjoyed this one!


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